The last few weeks I have went through the motions of getting the girls ready for school, but didn't really let it sink in until they were in bed last night. Then, I lost it. I went in to
MK's room and cried/prayed over her. Then I went to my room and as I was brushing my teeth and Brad asked "How was your day?" My response while spitting was "Fine" and then intense bawling.
Brad: Are you really crying?
Me: YES! I am sad and really crying about kindergarten!
Brad: Oh Stace, calm down.
Me: Well you know that next week she will make her first communion and in the spring we will shop for prom dresses!
Hysterically crying, flopped on my bed. Brad: Laughing You think she will find her boyfriend in kindergarten?
Me: No, but just yesterday we brought her home from the hospital. I am so worried that I didn't do a good enough job raising her these last five years and am just sending her off!
Still crying.Brad: You aren't sending her off to college, it is kindergarten.
Me: I know, but she can't tie her shoes!
Brad: She has
velcro.
Me: I know, but school is rough sometimes, making friends can be rough. I KNOW! I taught them! What if she can't find someone to play with at recess?
Full hysterics.Brad: She will have her good and bad days, just like everyone.
At this point I just gave up, still sobbing, but no more explaining. I was being completely nuts, Brad was being himself, obviously practical and
nada emotions or worries. Good thing, because if both of us were nut jobs we would really have problems. And yes, she is going to school where I taught for 6 years, plus work their a couple of days now. Yet, I was still crazy.
I then decided to read this book called "While They are Sleeping" and it is prayers for your children. I opened it up and noticed the inscription within the cover. It was a gift when I was pregnant with one of the girls, and it was from, none other than,
MK's kindergarten teacher! She is in good hands!
This morning we walked her in as a family. I was holding back tears the entire walk from the front door in. I have thought about this day for years, always knew she would go to school here. I stood in that school while in labor and gave Kansas Assessments. People most likely thought I was rude this morning, but I couldn't talk, in and out, unless they wanted a real mess on their hands!